A Food Critic
He is not born domineering, because he wants to better protect himself and his family. He has long known that the best defence is to arm himself, and he understands the principle of the weak and the strong in a fiercely competitive society. In his case, it doesn’t work if he is not strong enough. To win, he must have domineering power but does not bully the weak. He always wants to vindicate the “bad”, unbehaved, disobedient and unruly person in order to prove that the “bad” is not hopeless. Even if the “bad” can be successful, it has created Jacky’s lifelong belief.
Jacky Liew was born in a seemingly sophisticated family and valued for “face”. Due to his father win the lottery, his house began to hold the banquet and entertain guests frequently. It has a profound influence on Jacky’s life. He was full of admiration for his father’s knowledge on food and drink in the visitors’ mouths, and the eagerness was buried in his heart. He loves reading newspapers since he was young, and has a habit of collecting newspaper pieces. He loves to listen to adults talking about national events. In addition to reading books, he also likes to watch dramas, collects information about field folk customs and food allusions. The understanding of Jacky to the world and himself still through the books and newspapers, especially the famous column. Then for personal interest, when he was a teenager, he tried to write down the experience of eating and drinking in Chinese, and thus became very interested.
He knew a old story from his parents, in order to escape the war, his grandmother took her father who was born in China and came to Malaysia. As a native of Malaysia, Jacky was the first child and his parents had high hopes for him. However, they found that he was always too stupid to master vocabulary and pronunciation while studying. Teachers often complain about he was not handing in homework, going to class, and deliberately repeating the same learning mistakes. The more obvious mistakes he had made is wearing shoes and tying shoelaces cannot be mastered. In front of his parents, he was just a dull boy who daydreamed and couldn’t even explain things well.
Photo taken besides the portrait of the 10th Supreme Ruler in Malaysia
He vaguely remembered that when he was a child, he was hospitalized with diphtheria due to the negligence of his parents. After being injected, he ran away from the hospital and was caught by the nurse. From then on, he has trypanophobia and has a great fear of “needles”. He was pushing away the dentist’s syringe in a panic because of tooth extraction and injection. Soon after, he imitated the TV actor hanging on the roof, he hung himself on a tree outside the house. Fortunately, he was found rescued by passers-by, and he was beaten and scolded again. Once the house renovation, he took advantage of the workers to go out, climbed up a ladder, used the light bulb hung on the ceiling as a gun, and was electrocuted to the ground. Then he used his willpower to stand up and moved his paralyzed body, pretending to accompany his parents to eat with nothing. Therefore, he believes that willpower can be invincible in overcomes any body limitation. However, he still had acrophobia in fearing excessive heights. When he graduated and went out to work odd jobs, his colleague accidentally clipped his right middle finger, cause it infected and almost amputated. He had to take half a year to recover it. However, his father suspected that he has been trying to escape from work, gaining sympathy, and even recuperating at home. With these stupid deeds, his wife could not help but sigh, “although I understand you, fortunately that you are not my son, otherwise, I will be pissed off by you.”
Since he was in elementary school, he liked to read martial arts novels. The first novel he read was “The Legend of the Condor Heroes” which he borrowed from classmates, he fell in love with reading ever since. Regardless of any kind of book, he will read all day and night like a hungry person. After reading it, he will then borrowing another book in the rental bookstore, the basic knowledge of the Jacky Liew is derived from the reading of various books, and will repeatedly read the content that is not clear. In school, he will go through the roots of things that he doesn’t understand. This often made his teachers have a headache.
In order to catch up with his studies, his mother hired a family teacher who graduated from Form 5 for him. However, he was criticized by the elementary teacher and even in front of his neighbours. She said that Jacky Liew was not born to study, and was not as smart as his younger siblings. Even he also felt himself a useless person. Since then, parents and teachers have insisted he is a “bad kid”, and it doesn’t matter if he is being punished. The other pupils also don’t want to play games with him, but he still likes to hide in a corner and meditate and talk to himself.
During his semester, Jacky Liew always wanted to make his parents proud of his hard work. This has become a goal he pursued throughout his life. He has never won a praise from his father, even when the Jacky’s children elected into the best students’ class and got all A’s, all of them are excellent in character and academics. But in the past 20 years, they still haven’t received any praise from their grandparents or even a New Year’s Ang Pau (red packet). Jacky still remember that one week before the expected date of delivery of his third child, his car was sent to repair and he forced to go home to borrow the car from his parent. Jacky’s intention was to tell his father that his grandson was about to be born, but he got a refusal from him with the reason: “I was afraid of you getting my car dirty.” Life is a matter of life, but fortunately, a friend agreed to lent his only car and coincided the birth of the child in the next day. Luckily, both mother and child were safe. Until the birth of the youngest daughter, Jacky Liew was responsible for confinement, cooking, and washing diapers for his wife, then he became experts for it.
Nowadays the new standard of “a good man” ishe should knowing a hard time of woman in conceiving a baby for 10 months. When she is giving birth, it is equivalent to handing over her life to the gate of hell, thus, the husband should emphasize the mother care and helped her to restore her graceful body shape. For the confinement, a husband should take the greatest possible care of the wife. This is due to the wife will pain after giving birth to the child. Therefore for the week that after a mother had given birth, what should be eaten to eliminate filth from the body, in the second week, how to promote the uterine contraction to replenish vitality so that the heart, lungs, kidneys and organs during the puerperium can be restored from the burden and recovered the wound healing of the ureter, endocrine, internal secretions and gastrointestinal peristalsis, it would depend on health care at this time. The improper care would cause the slower recovery of the mother and the possibility of chronic postpartum illnesses. This is vital to the life of a beloved wife. It should not be overlooked either the immune function or disease-resistant body of the breastfeeding newborn’s child healthiness. Therefore, the mother and the newborn should be taken care of with due parental responsibility, so that the mother can recover quickly and the children may growing up healthily. This is a responsibility of “a good man” to the family and society. Jacky Liew even had been planning to come up with a confinement book to encourage husbands to confine their wives but was rejected by the publisher, saying that he had never seen a man write a confinement book.
After the 90-days of confinement of Christin and accompanied by Jacky Liew, she restore her curvy and graceful figure.
注The temperament of the new standard of the “good man” that women love
Jacky Liew believes that, a man should have high aims to govern the country (and bring peace to all), but one should first be able to govern one’s family; to govern one’s family successfully, one should first learn to govern oneself. However, the man nowadays should have independent personality and freedom of mind, he also should have a sense of responsibility and justice, and do not follow the trend in compete for fame and fortune. The values of a man’s thought and a charm of a man should not be measure by the money, the house, the car, and the educational background. His qualities should be self-confidence, demeanor, considerate, soft inside despite hard shell, has courage to face problems, do not evade responsibilities, be calm in the hour of peril, able to protect the people around. For his personalities, he should have aspiration, do great things, have ambitions, be responsible.
In fact, there are many Asian man know how to dress up well, but they still lack of masculine and walks to the path of male’s masculinity extinction. They are generally introverted, withdrawn, and weak. Besides, it is not difficult to find out that the talented men are not handsome enough; even that some are handsome, but they earn less money; some of them can make money but mostly ignore their families; some care for the families but felt that they unambitious; the one who ambitious but not romantic; the one who romantic seems unreliable; the one who reliable seems too weak. There is nothing perfect, so to become a real man and gentleman, in addition to education and training, he needs time to exercise himself.
As for women, beautiful women don’t like to cook; the one who know how to cook often no more in young age; the one gentle, but sometimes a nose of wax; the one who independent, lack of femininity; some have feminity but vain.
From the retelling of Jacky Liew earliest childhood memories, why did he fail to learn how to write in kindergarten? He often committed errors when copying text or forgot the spelling. Due to he had been suffered fatal Diphtheria and also his parents did not know that he had an unknown learning disability and Hyperactive, which made the impression that he was stubborn and a kid who difficult to teach. He remembered that once the teacher wanted to see his parents, since then, his father never asked about what he did, including his studies. His father used to compare him with his younger brothers and sisters, and let him bear the contempt from the younger brothers and sisters, they often said “wait until you can study well before you teach us. ” As a result, the friction between brothers and sisters lasted from childhood to middle age.
Since his father ignored him in childhood, the concern of his family also came to an abrupt end. In the description of how Jacky Liew worked hard to overcome the difficulties, he said that because he understood that asking for help would only be exchanged for more embarrassing condemnation, which made him even more embarrassed to ask for help. He felt that every of his progress should depend on his own efforts, depends on others will just made him scowl and be ashamed of being pity by others. He didn’t like to bother and be favoured by others. This is still the case today. Because he understands that even you repay back others help, there will be only the incidental sarcasm. Therefore, his father treated him in a cold manner which contributes to his stubbornness and perseverance. So that in the future, he also feels that his kind of personality is deriving through his unchallengeable father. Every day he just wants to grow up quickly and make himself independent and strong. No matter what the difficulty is, as long as he can survive and overcome it, it is reasonable training, if it is unreasonable, just treat it as chasten. Faintly he has the strength to rival his father. Although they have the same gene, they are two different types of men. He thinks that he will do better than their father.
Once, finally Jacky Liew seized the opportunity to tell his father that he wants to be a fashion designer and hopes to get support. However, as long as his parents think that the occupation has no future and are not follows to their wills, they will fall on deaf ears. Parents may pretend to be ignorant of their children and avoid financial problems. But the children are often the first to see their parents’ thoughts because they get along with their parents day and night. When he became a writer, he thought his parents would be happy, but this time he was sneered at by his father again and criticized in word “it is only useful when you earn more money”. Jacky was disappointed and felt that even he do well in the future, there are more facts and honors to support his successful, and he will only get more “unfortunate”, “unbelief”.
This is understandable if there is a child in the family who has been criticized as stupid and given up by the teacher since childhood and completely abandoned by his family, it is assumed that after ten years, the child turned into a successful man, and he went back home to tell his parents, he had rewarded the “title” from the royal family and his parents will be regarded as fake. His parents never expected that he would be brought the achievements home due to his stupidity since small. He remembered the first time, he drove home to visit his parents in a brand-new Mercedes, he accidentally discovered that his mother was picking up the Mercedes logo with her hand due to the Mercedes is an imported one and looks quite different to the model in the market. She thought that it was a fake one. Otherwise, it is obtained by improper means. Once again, he told his parents that he had been included in the ranks of celebrities who had been in line with the Who’s Who within hundred years in his hometown. Even if there were publications to testify, she still urged him to leave quickly, as if these matters are nothing to do with her business and she didn’t feel happy at all. This matter made Jacky Liew extremely confused. As a result, Jacky Liew developed the personality of seeking truth from all things, and always used evidence to prove himself, and paid more attention to reputation and status.
At that time, Jacky Liew had been trying to use various methods, even learning to cook, but never got his father’s praise. To let his son give up his dream of being a writer, he asked Jacky to learn to repair a car, he also promised that once he has his feet firmly planted on the ground, he would buy an old-fashioned second-hand car for him. The down payment will be pay by his father, and the instalment will be settled by Jacky. Jacky refused it as he understood that he couldn’t screw or unscrew all because of his learning disability and his skin was allergic. Moreover, he also understood that this was a deliberate arrangement by his father. His father hopes that he would be able to control him as an always good son and drive him, took his meagre salary as the payment in provides him food and shelter. Jacky’s other brother was arranged to earn US dollars in the United States. However, Jacky’s father never thought about the technologies of cars are ever-changing. By relying on the techniques of car reparation at that time, he could only repair old cars in the future. Furthermore, most people who use old cars are stretched out and will eventually end up complaining to his father that he was a useless son who is unable to earn money. So he refused this conditional invitation and bought a new car with a loan. Later, because he left home, his father dragged his new car backed to the old home and tied it to a lamp post with a big iron chain. The people in the villages talked about for it about half a year. Under the confrontation, Jacky and Christin were forced to walk for work and incurring ridicule from passing friends. Jacky at first wants to report his car lost, but later he thought that when the police asked for the whole course of the incident, how he should answer? Because the car is absurd at the home of Jacky’s father, much less, it was his father who did it, he finally gave up and did not repay the loan due to anger. Finally, the car was dragged away and he redeems it by himself. Ultimately, this is because his father is the head of the family, he has never allowed others to disobey his will and challenge his patriarchal. He even posted a big-character poster near his son’s rented premises, stated that “Go home and solve the problems” which caused a lot of discussion and suspicion in the surroundings.
From the perspective of the people in the village, his father possesses supreme authority and dignity, and he rarely interacts with others. His mother always tried to build friendly contacts with villagers. His father always has an unattainable posture. In the eyes of villagers, if a father treated his son in a bad way, the child will naturally become unpardonable and unfilial descendants. Even at Jacky’s siblings’ wedding banquet, Jacky was placed at the last table away from the head table, as punishment for disobedience and rebellion against his father and let all of the friends and relatives laugh at him. Since then, all of his friends and relatives kept away from him, he had never received any invitation from them. When recalled to the matter, Jacky has said that “when my children get married in the future and there will be no need for a banquet. Because Jacky has no any relatives anymore.” Jacky has been confused as to why his father always treats others to drinks even his finances have been exhaust and still enjoyed for the flattered from friends. He would like to experience his father’s profligacy behaviours outside to understand what kind of vain mentality is it? For work needs, Jacky Liew often joined in the feast and banquet, but mainly because of her father’s improper behaviour in her heart. This results in him always tried to get along the way with his father which ruthlessly hurting him and trying to touch the space left by his father, and looking for the childhood memories which lost his father and even be friends with his father’s previous friends to get a glimpse of the crux of the problem and kept himself never repeat the same mistakes.
According to Jacky Liew, who was a child labourer, recalled: “Getting the pocket money from parents indeed the most stringent test for Jacky Liew since childhood.” When he was still in elementary school, he has a strong sense of honour towards his friends. He often went to the small factory with her classmates to work as child labour. For the RM50 he was paid, he quickly signed up for his first martial arts class “Hong Ga (southern Chinese martial arts belonging to the Southern Shaolin styles” and bought the first novel in his life “The Prequel of Legend of the Condor Heroes”. After reading it, he vaguely feels why the style of writing is so different, but at the time he did not understand the reason. What’s more, because he is addicted to novels, and has no time to hand in his homework, he will trade with the neighbour’s child who got the first place in the whole Form and Jacky requested him to complete his writing task by paying RM 5. Decades later, he won’t know if his daughter inherited his character. At the age of 12, she submitted a manuscript to the “Little Star” publishing house without telling her father. She received the first manuscript fee for her first article “Childhood” and bought a detective novel at the bookstore. After finishing the novel “Sherlock Holmes”, she had a keen interest in psychology and reasoning at the time. With the 16-year-old winning the National Prose Award and the Special Award in Poetry, her talent has performed exceptionally in the arts and sciences, and her father helped to arrange for her a bright road in the judiciary in the future.
At that time, Jacky Liew understood that her mother had to take care of her younger siblings, do the housework, and she had to help with the family finances, so Jacky was in charge of studying and going to school by himself. The mother did sacrifice a lot to decorate his father’s beautiful life outside, and all the expenses could not be saved. Naturally, she would not spend too much time caring about a useless child, otherwise, she will keep scolding him all day long. Due to the trivial matters in his life, Jacky Liew does not want to stay at home. In order to earn money, he would wash the dishes outside and help out at the hawker centre, but no one has ever told him how to become a “useful person”, he himself too never thinks of what he can do, but often accustomed to hearing whispers from the people all around him.
Does he wonder how many cases due to the broken family had caused the tragedy of anti-social personality? Either becoming a mentally ill person or being a criminal or committing suicide because of the misery of the world, they will never become a useful person. The excellence of a person is by no means easy to develop, most of them come from families with political, economic, and cultural education. Jacky would like to say that although one’s current ability or knowledge is temporarily inferior to people if they want to fly high and build the future, they must let themselves control their own destiny.
CAUSES AND EFFECTS
THE LOVE AND HATRED BETWEEN
The Suffer and Pain Built a Writer
The long-term accumulation of a sense of alienation between Jacky Liew and his father had caused Jacky Liew almost obliterated by his overbearing father. He had experienced the hardship of growing up quite thoroughly long ago. It’s like a child who is forced to the edge of a cliff and cannot retreat.
According to Wang Guowei, the master of Chinese traditional studies, he put forward the phrase “the suffers that grants from the God will contributed to a writer”, which just interprets the disaster Jacky Liew suffered in childhood. It is precisely because God has arranged all kinds of dangerous situations into his experience, making a writer’s joy, anger, laughter and scolding become an essay. This is that as a writer, should treat all misfortunes as gifts, including frustration, shame, and failure, which can be a tool for the writer’s accomplishment.
Since his father seldom to went back home, Jacky began to exercise his independence and self-reliance. When he was a child, he knew that his father has a mistress outside. His father and mother always quarrel about this, which eventually caused his mother to leave the house. But his father took the opportunity to bring his younger siblings to see that woman with the intention to replace his mother’s position. His father even asked the children to call her “mother”. To protect his mother, he resolutely contends with the father and is reluctant to do it. Of course, he definitely knew that his future living would have a very hard time. But afterwards, the mother blamed him that annoyed his father. He became the scapegoat of his father, and his father blamed his mother for not teaching the children how to be polite. At that time, his mother still loves her husband, finally, the incident planted the evil cause of the distant between father and son, mother and son.
In this way, it was during his rebellious period. Although he desperately wanted his parents to care for him and take into account his feelings, however, under such a background, he became more and more alienated and hated his father.
Every time he recalled that lonely and faint childhood, Jacky Liew once said to his classmates: “From the very beginning, I didn’t get along well with my father. The only thing he would do is go against him, and he insisted not to call him “dad”. Instead, he called him “father” in an unfamiliar tone as a kind of accusation. On the one hand, because of his dissatisfaction with his father’s behaviour, and even this made his behaviour more grotesque which makes the family was disturbed. Her mother cursed and complained to him. But Jacky was initially sympathized with his mother for being deceived and wanted to speak out for her. But finally, it makes him became “heinous” in the eyes of his family. In the end, his mother chose to accept his father’s to stay, but Jacky chose to “escape” from home.
Futoshi Matsunaga Mind Control
Years later, he had no intention of reading a related case, one of which was the Japanese case “Futoshi Matsunaga Confinement Incident“. Analyzed from the psychological level, the Matsunaga designed a set of “patriarchal order”, that is, long-term psychological control of his wife Junko Ogata. Even if he had multiple mistresses outside, he still verbally insulted and abused his wife. This made her unable to resist her husband and made her follow her husband’s thinking. Later, Matsunaga manipulated seven of Ogata’s family members and had held their victims captive. Matsunaga imposed mental control and abuse to make them “psychological slaves”, until they scrambling to please him, and then obeying him. So that Matsunaga will treat them kindly and the victim thinks that obedient can avoid harm. If someone tries to violate it, others will turn against the opponent by fearing of abused by Matsunaga. This caused mutual betrayal, verbal abuse, and indifference between the victims so that no one wants to unite against Matsunaga. In fact, patriarchal order often seems around us. In the future, this will cause the psychological, spiritual, and moral distortions of the next generation, and endanger society and human relations.